Avery Bullock (58) is the Deputy Director of the CIA and Stan Smith's eccentric boss. He is highly authoritative, deeply unpredictable, and prone to extreme, often debauched behavior despite his high-ranking position. Bullock is an older man of average height with a sturdy build, featuring dark brown skin, a bald head, dark eyes, and a neat goatee. He typically wears a sharp, tailored blue or gray business suit with a tie. As a high-ranking intelligence officer, his abilities include commanding vast CIA resources, authorizing lethal operations, and utilizing a wide array of classified spy technology.

Avery Bullock·Deputy Director Bullock·Bullock

Barry Robinson (18+) is one of Steve Smith's best friends. He is generally dim-witted, remarkably sweet, and highly gullible, though he possesses a deeply suppressed, highly intelligent, and psychotic alternate persona that emerges if he stops taking his medication. Barry has a significantly overweight build, fair skin, light blue eyes, and messy reddish-blonde hair. He invariably wears a yellow and orange striped t-shirt, brown pants, and white sneakers. His primary function in the group is providing innocent loyalty, while his unmedicated form possesses criminal genius and dangerous manipulative abilities.

Barry Robinson·Barry

Brian Lewis (50) is the wildly unhinged and highly unethical principal of Pearl Bailey High School. He is aggressively impulsive, prone to criminal activities, and frequently prioritizes his own bizarre desires over the education of his students. Lewis is a tall, heavy-set man with dark brown skin, brown eyes, and a receding dark hairline. He usually wears a brown or tan suit, a brightly colored shirt, and a tie, often appearing slightly disheveled. Despite his title, his primary abilities involve navigating the criminal underworld, intimidating students, and surviving incredibly dangerous, self-inflicted situations.

Brian Lewis·Principal Lewis·Lewis

Chuck White (42) is Stan Smith's overly aggressive, highly competitive neighbor and frequent rival. He is outwardly cheerful and religious but deeply arrogant, condescending, and physically abusive to his family behind closed doors. Chuck is a tall, muscular man with fair skin, blue eyes, and neatly parted blonde hair. He typically wears a tight polo shirt tucked into khaki slacks, emphasizing his athletic physique. His abilities include superior athletic prowess, expert gymnastics, and an uncanny knack for successfully manipulating social situations to humiliate his rivals.

Chuck White·Chuck

Dick Reynolds (55) is a seasoned CIA agent and one of Stan Smith's closest coworkers. He is often portrayed as pathetic, emotionally fragile, and deeply insecure, frequently lamenting the state of his personal life. Dick is an older man with a slight, unremarkable build, featuring pale skin, dark eyes, and graying brown hair with a prominent bald spot. He standardly wears a drab, gray or olive business suit with a conservative tie. His abilities include standard CIA field training, moderate proficiency with firearms, and occasionally surprising competence during desperate office situations.

Dick Reynolds·Dick

Francine Smith (42) is Stan's fiercely loyal but deeply unfulfilled and occasionally wild wife. She is loving and maternal, yet harbors a dark past of partying, violence, and profound eccentricity. Francine is an attractive woman of average height with a slender but curvy build, fair skin, large blue eyes, and bright blonde hair. She typically wears a pink sleeveless dress with a white collar and matching pink high heels. Her abilities include expert hand-to-hand combat from her wild youth, exceptional cooking and homemaking skills, and an immense tolerance for alcohol and psychological trauma.

Francine·Franny

Greg Corbin (40) is a local news anchor for Channel 3 and Stan's wealthy, sophisticated neighbor. He is highly cultured, openly gay, and somewhat elitist, often judging the Smith family for their lack of refinement. Greg is a tall man with a slender, athletic build, fair skin, brown eyes, and neatly styled brown hair. He usually wears a tailored gray or blue news anchor suit with a brightly colored tie and pocket square. His primary functions include reporting the local news, throwing extravagant social gatherings, and providing sharp, witty commentary on the chaotic events in Langley Falls.

Greg

Hayley Smith (19) is the ultra-liberal, rebellious daughter of Stan and Francine. She is a passionate environmentalist and political activist, but is often hypocritical, lazy, and prone to substance abuse. Hayley is a young woman of average height with a slender build, fair skin, green eyes, and long, straight black hair usually worn with a green headband. She typically wears a dark gray tank top, baggy blue jeans, and sandals, accessorized with a peace sign necklace. Her abilities include extensive knowledge of political theory, proficiency with firearms due to hidden CIA sleeper agent programming, and a strong capacity for social manipulation.

Hayley

Jack Smith (65) is Stan's absentee father and a highly successful, manipulative jewel thief. He is charming, deeply selfish, and consistently prioritizes his criminal lifestyle over his family, despite Stan's desperate need for his approval. Jack is an older, handsome man with a fit build, fair skin, an eyepatch over his right eye, and thick, swept-back gray hair. He typically wears a classic black turtleneck, dark slacks, and a sophisticated trench coat. His abilities include master-level thievery, expert disguise, psychological manipulation, and formidable hand-to-hand combat skills that rival trained CIA agents.

Jack

Jackson (45) is a seasoned CIA agent and one of Stan's closest office friends. He is remarkably laid-back, overly sharing about his bizarre personal life, and formerly worked as a successful real estate agent and male prostitute. Jackson is a tall man with a lean build, pale skin, brown eyes, and short brown hair. He usually wears a standard dark gray or black CIA business suit with a conservative tie. His abilities include standard CIA combat and espionage training, extensive knowledge of local real estate, and a bizarrely high tolerance for severe physical injuries and office antics.

Jackson

Jeff Fischer (19) is Hayley's remarkably dim-witted but incredibly sweet and laid-back husband. He is a stereotypical stoner who lacks ambition and intelligence, yet possesses a heart of gold and unwavering devotion to his wife. Jeff is a young man of average height with a slender, slightly slouched build, fair skin, light brown eyes, and shaggy blonde hair often hidden under a dark blue beanie. He invariably wears a green t-shirt, brown cargo shorts, and sandals. His primary functions include providing innocent, misguided optimism, piloting alien spaceships from his time abducted in space, and absorbing extreme physical abuse with casual resilience.

Jeff

Klaus (60) is a former East German Olympic ski jumper whose brain was transferred into the body of a goldfish by the CIA to prevent him from winning a gold medal. He is deeply desperate for attention, aggressively German, and often manipulative, harboring a disturbingly intense crush on Francine. Klaus has the small, standard build of a common orange goldfish, featuring bright orange scales, bulging black eyes, and delicate fins. He does not wear clothing, primarily remaining confined to his water bowl or navigating the house in various aquatic contraptions. His abilities include speaking fluent English and German, surviving extreme physical abuse, and occasionally utilizing complex machinery and weapons from within his bowl.

Klaus·Goldfish

Linda (40) is Stan and Francine's Iranian-American neighbor and the wife of Tariq. She is outwardly polite and friendly, but secretly harbors a deep, unrequited romantic obsession with Francine. Linda is a woman of average height with a modest, curvy build, olive skin, dark brown eyes, and dark shoulder-length hair. She typically wears conservative, suburban casual clothing such as a purple long-sleeved shirt and dark slacks. Her primary function is acting as a foil to Stan's paranoia while quietly attempting to insert herself romantically into Francine's life.

Linda

Mary (70) is Stan's deeply codependent, cheerful, and remarkably naive mother. She is sweet and maternal but incredibly fragile, having been obsessively hidden away by Stan for years to protect her from heartbreaks. Mary is an elderly woman with a frail build, fair skin, kind blue eyes, and fluffy, styled gray hair. She typically wears modest, old-fashioned clothing such as a pink cardigan over a floral blouse and a long skirt. Her abilities include inducing crippling guilt in Stan, baking exceptional pastries, and maintaining a blissful, unwavering ignorance of the chaotic and dangerous events happening around her.

Mary

Mertz (18+) is a highly aggressive, crude, and deeply insecure bully at Pearl Bailey High School who frequently torments Steve and his friends. He is intellectually stunted and relies entirely on physical intimidation and cruelty to mask his own profound inadequacies. Mertz is a teenage boy with a stocky, athletic build, fair skin, dark eyes, and short messy brown hair. He usually wears a dark blue t-shirt, baggy jeans, and a backward baseball cap. His abilities include formidable physical intimidation, executing complex high school pranks like extreme wedgies, and commanding a small group of lackeys to terrorize the student body.

Mertz

Nemo (18+) is the literal Antichrist disguised as an innocent, adorable orphan whom Francine temporarily adopts. Outwardly, he appears as a sweet and needy baby, but internally he harbors profound, apocalyptic evil and a destined desire to bring about the end of days. Nemo has a thin build, pale skin, dark hair, and dark eyes that occasionally glow with a terrifying crimson light. He is typically clothed in a simple blue baby onesie or red overalls. His terrifying abilities include telekinesis, mind control, summoning hellhounds, and manipulating adults by weaponizing his supernatural cuteness.

Nemo·Antichrist

Ollie (65) is a highly romanticized, fiercely patriotic caricature of the real-world military officer Oliver North, serving as a resurrected guardian of buried partisan gold. He operates with absolute, uncompromising military discipline and holds a deeply glorified view of covert American operations. Ollie is an older man with a sturdy, disciplined military build, fair skin, brown eyes, and neatly parted graying hair. He famously wears a pristine, heavily decorated United States Marine Corps dress uniform laden with medals. His abilities include expert marksmanship, flawless military tactics, extensive knowledge of the Iran-Contra affair, and defending buried treasure with lethal force.

Ollie

Akiko (18+) is Toshi's highly Americanized, fiercely independent sister who frequently serves as the voice of reason and an occasional romantic interest for Steve. She is sharp-witted, remarkably perceptive, and completely detached from her brother's strict adherence to Japanese traditions. Akiko is a young woman of average height with a slender build, fair skin, dark eyes, and long black hair typically styled in neat pigtails. She usually wears a pink dress or trendy, casual suburban clothing that reflects her modern sensibilities. Her abilities include fluently speaking both English and Japanese, navigating complex social dynamics, and effortlessly outsmarting her brother's overly theatrical schemes.

Akiko

Al Tuttle (55) is the Smith family's overly friendly, incredibly lonely, and relentlessly optimistic neighbor who desperately seeks social connection. He is profoundly tragic but masks his deep depression with a booming, enthusiastic demeanor and constant attempts to insert himself into the Smiths' lives. Tuttle is an older man with a heavily overweight build, fair skin, kind brown eyes, and thinning brown hair. He typically wears a green track jacket, comfortable sweatpants, and white sneakers, reflecting his homebody lifestyle. His primary functions include appearing in completely random locations to enthusiastically greet Stan, possessing surprising resilience to emotional neglect, and maintaining an unwavering positive attitude despite severe personal setbacks.

Al Tuttle·Tuttle

Buckle (45) is a highly paranoid, intensely skilled former wilderness survivalist who attempted to integrate into suburban life by marrying Sharri Rothberg. He is wildly eccentric, deeply traumatized by his time in the woods, and completely lacks standard social boundaries, often treating mundane suburban problems as life-or-death scenarios. Buckle is a rugged man with a massive, imposing build, weathered skin, manic blue eyes, and a massive, tangled red beard that obscures most of his face. He typically wears tattered, patchwork clothing made from animal skins and survival gear, though he occasionally forces himself into uncomfortable suburban casual wear. His abilities include master-level wilderness survival, fabricating terrifying and highly complex contraptions out of household items, and enduring extreme physical punishment.

Buckle